Full List of Far-Right Red Tory Traitors To Be Deselected, Friends!

Hello, friends.

And a very warm welcome to you all on this Friday the 13th, which has turned out to be a lucky day for this Blog!  I’m very pleased to report that this Blog has had a (at least temporary) reprieve, thanks to Our EU, which has provided me the Blog with a one-off “grant” of £30,000 to enable this particular post to appear, despite Tory Austerity.

No conditions are attached to this financial help, which in any case will not in any way affect this Blog’s unconditional support of Our EU.

Let’s ditch the Far-Right Red Tory Traitors, friends!

Anyway, friends, on to a subject which I am quite sure you are all as excited about as I am!  My good friend and comrade, Comrade Commissioner of the otherwise disturbingly neoliberal Labour List, has now kindly drawn up a list of all the Far-Right Red Tory Traitors who currently snuggle in the bosom of the Good Ship Labour like a nest of vipers sharpening their teeth in the long grass roots, and who, like bears predictably missing the woods for the smelling salts, must now be crushed by the mass power of working people, i.e. myself, friends!

It must be stressed that this list is only provisional, friends, and it only covers the Labour Party Parliamentary Party.  Many, many more people will need to be added to it, if we are to achieve the sort of Momentum [Groan!J.C.] that This Great Movement Of Ours needs, as part of our long journey to the Promised Land of spilt milk and honey for tea, where the lamb will lay down with the unicorn, and all Hate Speech will be suppressed as part as our never-ending quest to totally smash all forms of intolerance, along with the Far-Right Red Tory Treacherous scum who sadly infest this so-called world of ours and indeed elsewhere.

Right of Appeal

Friends, many people – not all Far-Right Red Tory Traitors by any manner of means – have asked me, upon reading this rather long list, “Will there be a right of appeal, Lefty?”

To which the answer is that regrettably, no right of appeal will be allowed, otherwise we risk falling in to the trap of having a Party full of appealing people, which is the last thing we in the Labour Party need at this particular moment in time.

A generous and personal tribute to our “fallen” comrades, friends!

Obviously, friends, I would like to thank all the people who have served Our Great Movement for so long, and so faithfully, and who are about to leave our ranks.

But alas, friends, I have to be honest.  These people are quite frankly a total disgrace, and will not be missed in any shape or form whatsoever, quite frankly! They should just go and join the Tories!

Friends, it is never pleasant to say farewell to life-long comrades.  Fortunately, however, this is not remotely the case here, and all I personally want to say here is: Good Riddance to all the Red Tory scum and Far-Right Traitors!

Let us sing together in celebration, friends!

Friends, let us now sing together in celebration of the forthcoming deselection of these snakes in the grass, these n’er do well’s, these traitors who lurk in Trojan Horses inside the Labour Citadel, waiting to stab Our Jeremy in the back whilst spitting in his face!  Unfortunately, Our Emily, who was going to play the organ for this particular Blog, is “indisposed” owing to being on the list below (sorry, Emily!), so John has kindly agreed to tear himself away from his Little Read Book for a few minutes so he can perform this task for us – thanks, John!  All together now, friends:

So raise the scarlet standard high, whilst supporting Our Jeremy all the time,
Beneath its shade we’ll live and die, and win a 2020 Election landslide,
Though the Banksters and the 1% flinch, and Red Tory traitors predictably sneer,
We’ll totally smash the evil Tory scum, and keep the Red Flag flying here!

Provisional List of the Far-Right Red Tory Traitors to be deselected, friends!

Debbie Abrahams (Oldham East and Saddleworth)
Heidi Alexander (Lewisham East)
Rushanara Ali (Bethnal Green and Bow)
Graham Allen (Nottingham North)
David Anderson (Blaydon)
Jon Ashworth (Leicester South)
Ian Austin (Dudley North)
Adrian Bailey (West Bromwich West)
Kevin Barron (Rother Valley)
Margaret Beckett (Derby South)
Hilary Benn (Leeds Central)
Luciana Berger (Liverpool Wavertree)
Clive Betts (Sheffield South East)
Roberta Blackman-Woods (City of Durham)
Tom Blenkinsop (Middlesbrough South and East Cleveland)
Paul Blomfield (Sheffield Central)
Ben Bradshaw (Exeter)
Kevin Brennan (Cardiff West)
Lyn Brown (West Ham)
Nick Brown (Newcastle upon Tyne East)
Chris Bryant (Rhondda)
Karen Buck (Westminster North)
Richard Burden (Birmingham Northfield)
Andy Burnham (Leigh)
Dawn Butler (Brent Central)
Liam Byrne (Birmingham Hodge Hill)
Ruth Cadbury (Brentford & Isleworth)
Alan Campbell (Tynemouth)
Sarah Champion (Rotherham)
Jenny Chapman (Darlington)
Ann Clwyd (Cynon Valley)
Vernon Coaker (Gedling)
Ann Coffey (Stockport)
Julie Cooper (Burnley)
Rosie Cooper (West Lancashire)
Yvette Cooper (Pontefract and Castleford)
Neil Coyle (Bermondsey and Old Southwark)
David Crausby (Bolton North East)
Mary Creagh (Wakefield)
Stella Creasy (Walthamstow)
Jon Cruddas (Dagenham and Rainham)
John Cryer (Leyton and Wanstead)
Judith Cummins (Bradford South)
Alex Cunningham (Stockton North)
Jim Cunningham (Coventry South)
Nic Dakin (Scunthorpe)
Simon Danczuk (Rochdale)
Wayne David (Caerphilly)
Geraint Davies (Swansea West)
Thangam Debbonaire (Bristol West)
Gloria De Piero (Ashfield)
Stephen Doughty (Cardiff South and Penarth)
Jim Dowd (Lewisham West and Penge)
Peter Dowd (Bootle)
Jack Dromey (Birmingham Erdington)
Michael Dugher (Barnsley East)
Angela Eagle (Wallasey)
Maria Eagle (Garston and Halewood)
Clive Efford (Eltham)
Julie Elliott (Sunderland Central)
Louise Ellman (Liverpool Riverside)
Natascha Engel (North East Derbyshire)
Bill Esterson (Sefton Central)
Chris Evans (Islwyn)
Paul Farrelly (Newcastle-under-Lyme)
Frank Field (Birkenhead)
Jim Fitzpatrick (Poplar and Limehouse)
Robert Flello (Stoke-on-Trent South)
Colleen Fletcher (Coventry North East)
Caroline Flint (Don Valley)
Paul Flynn (Newport West)
Yvonne Fovargue (Makerfield)
Vicky Foxcroft (Lewisham Deptford)
Mike Gapes (Ilford South)
Barry Gardiner (Brent North)
Pat Glass (North West Durham)
Mary Glindon (North Tyneside)
Roger Godsiff (Birmingham Hall Green)
Helen Goodman (Bishop Auckland)
Kate Green (Stretford and Urmston)
Margaret Greenwood (Wirral West)
Lilian Greenwood (Nottingham South)
Nia Griffith (Llanelli)
Andrew Gwynne (Denton and Reddish)
Louise Haigh (Sheffield Heeley)
Fabian Hamilton (Leeds North East)
David Hanson (Delyn)
Harriet Harman (Camberwell and Peckham)
Carolyn Harris (Swansea East)
Helen Hayes (Dulwich and West Norwood)
Sue Hayman (Workington)
John Healey (Wentworth and Dearne)
Mark Hendrick (Preston)
Stephen Hepburn (Jarrow)
Meg Hillier (Hackney South and Shoreditch)
Margaret Hodge (Barking)
Sharon Hodgson (Washington and Sunderland West)
Kate Hoey (Vauxhall)
Kate Hollern (Blackburn)
George Howarth (Knowsley)
Lindsay Hoyle (Chorley)
Tristram Hunt (Stoke-on-Trent Central)
Rupa Huq (Ealing Central & Acton)
Dan Jarvis (Barnsley Central)
Alan Johnson (Kingston upon Hull West and Hessle)
Diana Johnson (Kingston upon Hull North)
Gerald Jones (Merthyr Tydfil and Rhymney)
Graham Jones (Hyndburn)
Helen Jones (Warrington North)
Kevan Jones (North Durham)
Susan Elan Jones (Clwyd South)
Mike Kane (Wythenshawe and Sale East)
Gerald Kaufman (Manchester Gorton)
Barbara Keeley (Worsley and Eccles South)
Liz Kendall (Leicester West)
Stephen Kinnock (Aberavon)
Peter Kyle (Hove)
David Lammy (Tottenham)
Christopher Leslie (Nottingham East)
Emma Lewell-Buck (South Shields)
Ivan Lewis (Bury South)
Ian Lucas (Wrexham)
Holly Lynch (Halifax)
Fiona Mactaggart (Slough)
Justin Madders (Ellesmere Port and Neston)
Khalid Mahmood (Birmingham Perry Barr)
Shabana Mahmood (Birmingham Ladywood)
Seema Malhotra (Feltham and Heston)
John Mann (Bassetlaw)
Rob Marris (Wolverhampton South West)
Gordon Marsden (Blackpool South)
Rachael Maskell (York Central)
Chris Matheson (City of Chester)
Steve McCabe (Birmingham Selly Oak)
Kerry McCarthy (Bristol East)
Siobhain McDonagh (Mitcham and Morden)
Andy McDonald (Middlesbrough)
Pat McFadden (Wolverhampton South East)
Conor McGinn (St Helens North)
Alison McGovern )Wirral South)
Liz McInnes (Heywood and Middleton)
Catherine McKinnell )Newcastle upon Tyne North)
Jim McMahon (Oldham West and Royton)
Alan Meale (Mansfield)
Edward Miliband (Doncaster North)
Madeleine Moon (Bridgend)
Jessica Morden (Newport East)
Ian Murray (Edinburgh South)
Lisa Nandy (Wigan)
Melanie Onn (Great Grimsby)
Chi Onwurah (Newcastle upon Tyne Central)
Albert Owen (Ynys Mon)
Teresa Pearce (Erith and Thamesmead)
Matthew Pennycook (Greewich and Woolwich)
Toby Perkins (Chesterfield)
Jess Phillips (Birmingham Yardley)
Bridget Phillipson (Houghton and Sunderland South)
Stephen Pound (Ealing North)
Lucy Powell (Manchester Central)
Yasmin Qureshi (Bolton South East)
Angela Rayner (Ashton-under-Lyne)
Jamie Reed (Copeland)
Steve Reed (Croydon North)
Christina Rees (Neath)
Rachel Reeves (Leeds West)
Emma Reynolds (Wolverhampton North East)
Jonathan Reynolds (Stalybridge and Hyde)
Marie Rimmer (St Helens South and Whiston)
Geoffrey Robinson (Coventry North West)
Steve Rotherham (Liverpool Walton)
Joan Ryan (Enfield North)
Naseem Shah (Bradford West)
Virendra Sharma (Ealing Southall)
Barry Sheerman (Huddersfield)
Paula Sherriff (Dewsbury)
Gavin Shuker (Luton South)
Tulip Siddiq (Hampstead and Kilburn)
Andy Slaughter (Hammersmith)
Ruth Smeeth (Stoke-on-Trent North)
Andrew Smith (Oxford East)
Angela Smith (Penistone and Stocksbridge)
Jeff Smith (Manchester Withington)
Nick Smith (Blaenau Gwent)
Owen Smith (Pontypridd)
Karin Smyth (Bristol South)
John Spellar (Warley)
Keir Starmer (Holborn and St Pancras
Jo Stevens (Cardiff Central)
Wes Streeting (Ilford North)
Graham Stringer (Blackley and Broughton)
Gisela Stuart (Birmingham Edgbaston)
Mark Tami (Alyn and Deeside)
Gareth Thomas (Harrow West)
Nick Thomas-Symonds (Torfaen)
Emily Thornberry (Islington South and Finsbury)
Stephen Timms (East Ham)
Anna Turley (Redcar)
Karl Turner (Kingston upon Hull East)
Derek Twigg (Halton)
Stephen Twigg (Liverpool West Derby)
Chuka Umunna (Streatham)
Keith Vaz (Leicester East)
Valerie Vaz (Walsall South)
Tom Watson (West Bromwich East)
Alan Whitehead (Southampton Test)
Phil Wilson (Sedgefield)
David Winnick (Walsall North)
Rosie Winterton (Doncaster Central)
John Woodcock (Barrow and Furness)
Iain Wright (Hartlepool)
Daniel Zeichner (Cambridge)
Catherine West (Hornsey and Wood Green)