And today’s Blog is being brought to you by – literally – magic! Yes, it’s appearing even though I am – literally – not here! Which is, when you come to think about it, literally amazing, isn’t it, friends? [What are you talkin’ about, Lefty? This is just the World Wide Web, where people can write from wherever they’re at! – J.C. Jeremy, could you please stop being so literally literal-minded! – L.]
Once again, it is a round-up of some of my best Tweets [If these are really your “best” ones, Lefty, I truly shudder to think what the worst ones are like! – J.C. Oh Jeremy! Do you always have to be so literally negative about my work? – L. You literally give me no choice, Lefty! – J.C.] from the past week, which I hope you’ll enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed composing them, whatever the Hard-Right Jeremy may viciously say!
As I am, for personal reasons which cannot be divulged here [Oh go on, Lefty! I could do with a laugh! – J.C. No, Jeremy! My lips are – literally – sealed! – L.], not going to be able to write many Tweets this week, this Blog will be taking a short break for the next two weeks [Lazy sod. – J.C. Jeremy! I literally beg you to desist from making all these literally snide interjections! I really don’t know what’s literally happened to you! – L. No comment! – J.C.] and will return with a bumper edition of two weeks’ worth of Tweets on Sunday 4th December.
Once again, here’s a link to my Guardian pieces, for anyone who finds this more convenient than the ones given via the Tweets:
Anyway, friends, here – literally – goes, starting with a special bonus, for literally no extra charge, my most popular Tweet to date, from those far-off days of July:
Friday 22nd July
Sunday 13th November
Monday 14th November
Tuesday 15th November
Wednesday 16th November
Thursday 17th November
Friday 18th November
Saturday 19th November
Let us sing together, friends!
Friends, even though I am literally not here, I have a feeling that you would still like to sing our little anthem together! So, with Diane as usual literally on the organ, and Jeremy taking lead vocals in my stead, please feel free to sing that rousing chorus from my specially adapted version of that musical and lyrical classic, Our Red Flag. All together now, friends: