And I expect that you are all waiting with – literally – bated breath for the answers to my now long-established
Christmas Winterval Season Quiz, which older readers will doubtless recall goes back all the way to those far-off days of 1896, when many of you were – literally – young Earthlings!
Anyway, the good news is that the wait is now – literally – over!
The Questions will, as usual, be published next
Anyone who guesses all 30 Questions correctly will win a copy of my forthcoming tome, Lefty’s Little Read Book Of Literally Literary Delights, personally
rubber-stamped signed by Yours Truly.
Here are the answers, friends:
- Keith Vaz. 8 inches.
- Trump, Thatcher and Farage. None of the others are literally Fascists.
- (c) because it isn’t literally a Hate Crime.
- Neil Hamilton. None of the others would be able to get away with it.
- If you can see this answer, I regret to tell you that your computer has been – literally – hacked.
- The Far-Right Bullingdon Bully Boy May.
- This was a trick question, friends! Bet you all thought it was Gary Lineker, but you made the mistake of thinking that because he fell in to category (iv) he would automatically need a brain transplant. It was actually David Lammy.
- There is literally no Question 9, friends.
- Because all non-voters are Labour supporters and Remainers.
- It was in the Far-Right neoliberal racist Guardian.
- Along with Our NHS, it is literally the Envy of the World, and indeed elsewhere.
- “Our friends in Hezbollah and Hamas”, which was taken totally out of context.
- (i) Hard-Right Climate Change, which is literally destroying the world, and indeed elsewhere. (ii) Settled. (iii) Well over 100% of all Scientists.
- Because it’s – literally – totally unelected.
- (e) Tim Farron. All the others are well-known.
- Our Hillary. Over 30 billion votes at latest count, and still – literally – rising.
- Caused by Hard-Right Brexit.
- They’re all children. (Average age less than 36.)
- He’s a total nutter (because Hard-Right), hence his name.
- (i) Literally £350 billion/day for our NHS – a Hard-Right Leaver LIE. (ii) On the side of a LYING Far-Right omnibus of distinctly racist tendencies.
- The Fascist Daily Fail, because it’s – literally – failing, and is – literally – Fascist.
- Our Baroness Shami’s report proved there was – literally – none.
- She first denied it existed, and then – literally – destroyed it.
- (a) KFC bucket. (b) Islington High Street.
- Because 48 is – literally – more than 52.
- They are all – literally – worse than Hitler.
- The Far-Right racist neoliberal Obama, formerly Our Obama.
- It was an anagram: Jeremy Corbyn and Fidel Castro.
- The vicious Exit Poll, along with Ed Miliband’s Far-Right racist neoliberalism.
Let us sing together, friends!
And now it’s time for our little sing-song together! And, talking of songs, I have an exciting Song Titles Game which I am planning to – literally – launch simultaneously on the Hard-Right Twitter and the Far-Right WordPress in the – literally – near future! I do hope you’ll all – literally – join in, friends, as this will be – literally – the best Song Titles Game Ever! [I see your sense of self-importance hasn’t been in any way diminished in the New Year, Lefty! – J.C. Jeremy, I am growing more than a little weary of your constant sniping from the – literally – gutter! Kindly decease! – L. “Desist”, surely, Lefty? You wouldn’t want me to, to use one of your favourite words – literally – pass away, now would you? After all, where would you and your Blog be if I weren’t here? – J.C. No comment! – L.]
Anyway, friends, enough of all this – literally – gay banter! Are you ready? (Friend Dave S. – can you – literally – take a turn at the organ today? Thanks!) All together now, friends: