Lefty’s Sunday Selection Of Literally Best Tweets [I’m Literally Speechless, Lefty! – J.C. That’s Hardly My Fault, Jeremy! You Shouldn’t Have Sacked Your Speechwriter! – L. Groan! – J.C.], 8th-15th January

Hello, friends.

And first of all, a – literally – big Thank You to all of you who contributed to Lefty’s Literally Best-Ever Song Titles Game!  We can all be truly proud of the sheer number of “literally’s” that, by working together – and we on the Progressive Left always work together, friends, unlike Hard-Right elements, e.g. Blair, who prefer war, poverty and Foodbanks – we have managed to literally insert in to so many popular song titles!

The Game remains open to anyone who wishes to contribute [No fear!J.C. Oh Jeremy! There’s nothing to fear! Everyone I know here, and indeed on the Far-Right Twitter, are new, kinder and gentler people, unlike the literally vicious Tories!  – L.], and I have, in a literally generous fit of literal generosity, decided to award a prize of a personally rubber-stamped signed copy of Lefty’s Little Read Book Of Literally Literary Delights to every single contributor!

Details, friends!

Yes, friends, a – literally – FREE prize to every single contributor! It’s literally unbelievable, isn’t it? But that’s – literally – the Progressive Left Way!

Simply fill in the form at the bottom of this Blog and send it, together with a small handling charge fee (£50), to the following address:

Lefty’s Scam – literally – FREE Book Offer,

Lefty Towers,

Left Bank,

Dorset. L1T TRAL1

and Lefty’s Book will literally be in your hands before you literally know it!

Tweets, friends!

Anyway, friends, enough of this literally gay banter! Let’s get on with the main purpose of this Blog [Question, Lefty!J.C. Yes, Jeremy – literally fire away!L. Has this Blog really got any purpose at all, other than your own self-aggrandisement?J.C. Oh, Jeremy! You can be so – literally – bitchy  at times!L.] and list last week’s Tweets:

Sunday 8th January

Monday 9th January

Tuesday 10th January

Wednesday 11th January

Thursday 12th January

Friday 13th January

Saturday 14th January

Sunday 15th January

****************************************************

Let us sing together, friends!

And finally [Phew!J.C.] it’s time for our little sing-song together, friends! And how about a – literally – specially adapted version of my already-adapted version of that musical and lyrical classic, Our Red Flag? (Friend Singer – could you stop writing literally Hard-Right comments here for literally just one minute, and literally take a hand at the organ? Thanks!) All together now, friends:

So – literally – raise the scarlet standard high,
whilst literally supporting Our Lefty all the time.
Beneath its shade we’ll literally live and die,
and literally win many consecutive Election landslides.
Though the Banksters and the 1% literally flinch,
and literally Red Tory traitors predictably sneer,
We’ll totally smash the literally evil Tory scum,
and keep the Red Flag literally flying here!

 

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20 thoughts on “Lefty’s Sunday Selection Of Literally Best Tweets [I’m Literally Speechless, Lefty! – J.C. That’s Hardly My Fault, Jeremy! You Shouldn’t Have Sacked Your Speechwriter! – L. Groan! – J.C.], 8th-15th January

  1. Holy moly, tweet deja vu never felt so literally gut- wrenching. I refer everyone to my considered last post (no necrotic jokes here please!) for last week’s “best” (my sides literally ache) tweets.
    Have sent my £50 to the Royal Society for the finding of lost racing pigeons, rather than than clutter the hard-worked postal services with your book. Am avidly awaiting the appearance of royal Big Ears efforts to engage the difficult Ladybird market on the topic of climate change. I am informed by the dastardly Daily Mail that every word in it has been carefully chosen.

    I trust you managed without my efforts at the organ. I don’t do benefits. Nice, however after all this time to be asked.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I note with considerable [fill in here whatever you like] that the classic [ditto] now contains an almighty eight (count them) literallies, one for each line. This must have literally taken you minutes.
    Bravo (not a coded message).

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Tis grand to be back.
    Just been serving the old girls at the old mass there, an all an all to be sure.
    Tis a fine site so it is-and a delight to see all these blogs all rolled together like a giant spliff on the thighs of Castors mistress.
    Has been a long wee-so grant to catch up on the news here in the Ould Sod.
    Am looking for a choir master to sing hymns to the homeless. Your site seems to encourage wastrels and sots, happy to share a communion whine with any of ye!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Watching our Jeremy on the far right hated BBC hate filled neo fascist Andrew Marr show I became literally overwhelmed at the supreme greatness of our Jeremy. Literally destined to out rank Napoleon, Xerxes , Attila, in the pantheon of the great
    From now on I literally feel that to refer to the great one as the leader of the Labour party is to .diminish him. Surely Lefty you can guide us as to the correct form of address that we can use to literally convey our awe and devotion to him.
    I await guidance.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Dave S your extreme supineness has been noted by TTM (=Those That Matter).
    You have been awarded the unprecedented honour of the gilded cycle-clip.
    What is your neck size?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Singer- Have you literally let your mask slip? Are you a far right Neofascist brexit loving pro Trump plant here to disrupt and upset those of us who are genuinely literally trying to create a new society and literally believe that Lefty and Jeremy will take us to victory over the hated May Bulingdon class of far right scum. I say this because you accuse me of extreme supineness.
    How can devotion to Jeremy be extreme or supine? I accuse you of being literally a deviant splitter. May Left decide.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Friend Dave! I – literally – agree with literally everything you’ve written, whatever it was.

    The Hard-Right Singer is a Far-Right hater, and for that I hate him, I hate him, I HATE HIM!

    When Jeremy and I ascend to Supreme Political Power – which cannot be soon – we shall – literally – deal with him in the most severe way possible. Although we haven’t worked out the full details of the exact nature of the punishment, it will almost certainly involve Friend Singer being put on at least one of my Little Lists.

    Like

  8. Letfly, Dave S. I protest literally vehemently. I have constantly pledged my devotion to our one and only Leader Jeremy and have not deviated from this. I do not recognize the “leadership” of a tuppenny-hapenny blog merchant like Letfly whose allegiance literally swings with the breeze and who has grossly insulted our I-tie (sorry Italian) brethren. Only last week he called our Leader Right-wing and civil war almost literally broke out in the Home Counties. As it is we may lose the beer mecca of Stoke.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Let me intervene with an apt intervention here.
    Let there be -literally-love in this real sense and context.
    I do see harmony-let me bring discord.
    No -sorry-other way round.
    As we on the far shores of Left thinking know-Ra Ra Rasputeen was indeed ” Lover Of The Russian Queen”.
    It was Svetlana Stalinburg who he loved, and this cemented the Revolution as I recall.
    Is Dianne Abbotburg available for a suitable match for me?
    If so, I will quite literally set about blessing all your candles-and more than hapopy to arraonge a good wick dipping for those who see me as this sites Primate Uber Pares.
    Bless You All.
    Think we all need to pledge one unto another here-let love be the answer-and lets play those mind games together…as our hero Lennon sang in his Finland sealed Pullman Imp.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Your Pre-lateness, as Dick Emery literally said “Oh! You are so awful, but I like you!

    Letfly, I do not hate you, but there are literally other words.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Letfly. I do hope that by now you have calmed down and taken your meds. To threaten me with literally the supreme and subprime sanction of being put on one of your little lists was beyond the pale. I am positively bleached. Am I to join the 17 million plus? It wasn’t me that characterized comrade Dave of extreme supineness but the high and mighty TTMs of Central Office (literally a hive of right-wing Brexiteers). Don’t hate the messenger.

    Many regrets; I had aspirations of singing beneath Westminster Bridge – currently occupied by a hoard of Tory Orcs fishing for SNP salmon and the odd kipper. They sound awful.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. A Statesmanlike-response Singer.
    Which is no more that one would expect of such a consensual adult in its-quite literal- derivation and etymological contexts..
    Not sure Dick said “SO” in his oft-quoted biblical text as you imply.
    being such a pedant-wonder if I may yet be your theological mentor as you sing under your bridge, set fair to heal your rumpus with Lefty of All The Communards.
    I pray and weep…I peep and ray as well, knowing that -with love, reconciliation and an agreement to share all future power with me as your Venting Vicar-we may yet bring our Trotsky and firebrand together with the cool and Leninist/Marxo-Starling Leader of us all who is Supporter Lefting.
    As long as I get the housekeepers and lefty dollies here at this site-and some communion whisky-I`ll pray for all of ye or none…beejayzus!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Letfly My postie friends tell me that your “Lefty’s Little Book Of – Literally – Lies” won’t go through letterboxes. Too many lies?

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Friend Singer! Your postie “friends” are – literally – lying about this.

    It’s doubtless just their excuse to literally steal copies, even though the book is in fact very modestly priced. (£29.99 each, or – a literally special offer – 3 for £99.99.)

    Like

  15. The mind actually boggles that posties would want to steal your massive booklet, which I understand actually comes in at just over 1.5 kilos. Gosh, that’s £20 per kilo of lies! Actually it costs more because of the surcharges imposed by Royal Mail for under-postage.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Scarlet Red and Rosy Pink
      Go together nicely don`t you think?
      Side by side on my sideboard in a vase
      Oh Lefty why can`t we?

      Yes I know, the temptings of a friend or a troll can be harsh
      But in the end, destinys child is the critical friend.
      And are we not agreed
      The Revolution hues are the colours we bleed
      Both of red and pink, let alone vermillion
      Think of Marillion.

      (Chorus rpt).
      To be sung to the “Ebony and Ivory” marching tune.

      Like

  16. Cheryl. I have thought of Marillion and consulted my friend Wiki. He tells me that “the chief music critic of The Guardian, Alexis Petridis, has described Marillion as “perennially unfashionable prog-rockers”.” I know anyone who proselytizes their artistic soul for that ultra far-right rag cannot be trusted, but it does present moi with a problem. What exactly Cheryl are you suggesting here?
    I need my friend Wiki to advise me on matters musical since I was away investigating bridges in North America in the 1970s and 1980s. Today opera is my forte, but clearly is not Letflys.

    Like

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